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The Queen of Hearts

Chapter seven

It was a week before Madison could pluck up enough courage to finally leave the house. He’d spent the days in Jamie’s room, packing his things up into boxes so they could store it- he wouldn’t let anything get thrown away.

Rob was due to move in at the end of the week. He had had some trouble with the apartment that he shared with another boy and since Madison and Alysia needed a third person to help with the rent, it had seemed like the obvious solution.

It had been hard to make the decision of Rob moving in. True, he liked the boy, he was good and kind, but he wasn’t Jamie. It almost felt like he was trying to be a replacement, but he would never be able to live up to it

Madison had decided to give Rob his room so he could move himself into Jamie’s. He didn’t like the idea of anyone else sleeping and living in his best friend’s room- it had seemed like the best thing to do. He’d worked hard to pack most of Jamie’s things away, but he left some as they were, photos that he’d stuck on the walls of the three housemates out together enjoying themselves as well as various mementos of their lives together. Looking at them had made him cry in the beginning, but he’d surpassed that. He had decided to take Detective Todd’s advice and think about what Jamie would have wanted him to do.

He still hadn’t gone back to work yet. He knew he was pushing it, but Rob and Maddox seemed to have come to some sort of arrangement that allowed him to stay at home until he was ready.

That morning, Alysia had gone out, visiting a friend across town and it was Madison’s job to get the grocery shopping done. He dressed himself in a warm, dark sweater that had been Jamie’s and as a result, hung slightly large on his slender frame, and a pair of jeans that were low on his hips. He’d lost a lot of weight since Jamie had gone, none of his clothes fit anymore.

Madison took the bus to the grocery store since he couldn’t drive and didn’t own a car. It wasn’t a very long journey, about ten minutes and he got off at the bus stop just outside the store.

They didn’t have so much for groceries that week, since only Alysia had been working. He tried to think about what they needed and what things he could cut down on to keep within the budget. It wasn’t too hard, since he hadn’t been eating himself.

As he was paying for the items, he felt a tap on his shoulder and turned to see Detective Todd standing behind him. The man looked very different, dressed in jeans, a t shirt and a corded jacket.

“Hello Madison. Didn’t expect to run into you here.”

“Hello detective.”

Madison paused as the cashier finished the scanning and he pulled a few bills out of his pocket to pay for the groceries. The bags were heavy for him, especially since he’d grown so weak in the past few days and he struggled to lift them. It was one thing to push a trolley around the store and another to carry it home afterwards.

He was saved from having to lift the bags by Detective Todd stepping round him, lifting them with ease.

“I’ll take them to your…car for you?”

“I caught the bus.”

The blond nodded, encouraging Madison to walk alongside him as he walked towards the exit.

“I’ll give you a lift home then, it’s not far.”

“It’s not…” Madison began, but the detective just smiled.

“Please, I insist.”

The boy reluctantly agreed, feeling a little uncomfortable about getting a lift with a man he barely knew, but it would save him the bus money, and he’d get some help taking the groceries to the house. Detective Todd had a nice car, a sleek, expensive model that Madison would never have been able to afford in a million years. The seats were incredibly comfortable and, as he found out when they began driving, they were heated.

“How can you afford a car like this on a cop’s salary?” Madison asked as Detective Todd pulled into the main road. There wasn’t too much traffic around that time of day, but the man drove slower than usual as the roads were a little icy.

“My parents were extremely wealthy,” the man replied, “They left me a lot of money when they died.”

“Then why are you working as a detective?”

It was a concept Madison found it hard to get his head around. If he had enough money not to work, he definitely wouldn’t. He would spend his days relaxing and pampering himself for a change.

“Because I actually enjoy my job. I like knowing I’m making a difference…even if it’s just a little one.”

Madison fell silent. Enjoying ones job was something else he couldn’t understand…he had never done anything except prostitution, and he hated it more than anything.

A few minutes later, the detective pulled up outside Madison’s house. Before the boy could open the door, the blond had moved round to open it for him. He also insisted in taking all the bags and carrying them into the kitchen for him.

“Madison, this might be presumptuous of me…” the detective began, “But would you like to come out with me for some lunch? I know it helps to have a little company after such huge grief.”

He knew Madison would most likely decline his request, but he felt he should offer. The boy looked so miserable and lonely, and having been through the same grief, he knew how much it helped to have someone there.

Madison was about to say no, but something stopped him. The detective seemed like a nice enough man, and he was someone who knew first hand what he was going through, someone who could help. If Jamie were there, he would have made him go.

“Okay detective, that would be nice, thank you.”

“Please, call me Zach.”

The blond took him to a small café on the other side of town. He had planned on taking Madison to a fancy restaurant, but he knew the boy would probably feel out of place and uncomfortable. The café they went to was owned by one of Zach’s friends and he knew they served extremely tasty food.

He was the perfect gentleman. He opened the car door once more for Madison, guiding him into the café with a hand at his elbow and then pulled back a chair for him at their table. They started with coffee and he was happy to recommend a meal from the menu since Madison was unsure. He knew it wouldn’t be a good idea to order the boy a huge meal, as he looked like he’d barely eaten in a week.

“Why are you being so kind to me?” Madison asked finally, pushing his food around the plate with his fork. He’d had a few bites, but he wasn’t up to eating much. “After you arrested me for prostitution…I’m a criminal.”

Zach sighed, shaking his head and laying his fork down. He reached across the table to place his hand on top of Madison’s smaller one.

“You’re not a criminal Madison. You’ve just had a bad life, a raw deal. You did what you had to to get by. When I told you that prostitution isn’t the only way you can earn money…I meant that, but I know you’re left with few options.”

“My parents died,” Madison told him, drawing his hand back from the man’s and placing it in his lap. “I don’t have any other relatives…I went to the orphanage…that’s where I met Jamie, but we couldn’t handle it, so we ran away…”

He broke off, staring down at the plate. “Prostitution was the only option.”

“It’s dangerous, Madison. I don’t want to find you in some alleyway next…”

He knew that had been a bad thing to say when he saw the tears well up in the boy’s eyes. But it was the truth, the next victim could be anyone, and Jamie’s death meant that he was in the area, he had been to the place where Madison worked.

“Maybe it would be best if you did…” the boy whispered, not sure if he meant the man to hear or not. If Zach did hear, he didn’t say anything about it.

The rest of the meal was eaten in almost silence. The detective had asked Madison out for lunch in an attempt to cheer him up, but he only seemed to have succeeded in making him even more depressed.

He took him straight home afterwards, opening the door for him again and escorting him to the doorstep. The boy paused when he’d found his keys, turning to face the man.

“Thank you for the meal, detective,” he said softly, watching as Zach stepped up next to him.

“It was my pleasure, Madison. I would like to do so again sometime…if you’d let me.”

The boy nodded, unsure if he meant it or not. “That would be nice.”

The blond turned to leave, but he stopped himself, suddenly turning to Madison and slipping an arm around his back, using his other hand to tilt the boy’s head up. Their eyes met briefly before Zach leaned down, pressing his lips to Madison’s soft ones.

It was only a brief kiss, a soft brush of the lips, but he paused afterwards, reaching up to brush Madison’s bangs out of his eyes.

“I can’t stop thinking about you,” he whispered before suddenly releasing the boy, stepping back. “It was nice to see you again, Madison. I’ll be in touch later.”

He then turned and got back into his car, leaving a stunned Madison standing on the doorstep.

Madison reached to slide his hand into Rob’s, feeling the other boy grip his arm as he got out of the car. When he had done so, the blond slipped an arm around his shoulders and when Alysia joined them, the three began making their way towards the church, slowly and sombrely.

The time had come for Jamie’s funeral. All of his friends were gathering at a small church on the outskirts of town for a small ceremony in which they could commemorate his life. Madison and Alysia had made the decision to have him cremated- they didn’t like the idea of him rotting beneath the ground.

Getting ready for the funeral had been the hardest thing Madison had ever had to do in his life. It was a challenge just to get out of bed that morning, he was like a zombie as he shuffled to have a shower and then back to his room to dress. He hadn’t had the energy to choose clothes, so Alysia had laid some out for him while he’d been in the shower.

The blond had picked out a long, black dress that Jamie had loved Madison in, one that almost swept the ground as he walked. It pinched in tight around the waist, showing just how much weight Madison had lost since his friend had died. The weather was still cold, so Alysia had also unearthed a black shawl for him to wear around his shoulders.

The two had even had to help him with his hair and makeup, applying tasteful mascara, a little lipstick and blow-drying his hair to style it loosely around his face. It had been a long time since he’d worn his hair down, but it was another thing Jamie had loved- he did it for him.

They hadn’t dared risk letting him wear high heeled shoes, so he had a pair of slender, black slip-ons that were slightly too big for him.

Rob and Alysia walked close to him as they made their way to the church, the former with an arm around his shoulder, the latter holding tightly to his hand. There weren’t many people to attend Jamie’s funeral, just a small number of ‘work friends’, some people they’d met out at clubs, and an elderly couple they didn’t recognise. Madison found it hard to look at any of them as he made his way to the church’s front pew, sliding into his seat. He was due to stand up and say a few words, being Jamie’s best friend, but he didn’t know if he was going to be able to keep himself from crying long enough to speak.

Jamie’s body lay in a coffin at the front of the church, the top half opened. The undertakers had done an excellent job, Jamie looked so peaceful, lying with his eyes closed, a bunch of blood-red roses lying on his chest. They would never have been able to afford such expensive procedures, and the rich, pine coffin, but they had been helped by a mysterious benefactor that had paid for the whole thing.

Madison couldn’t look at the coffin, at the body of his best friend.

As soon as everyone was seated, the ceremony began. Madison hated it, that it was conducted by a man who hadn’t even known Jamie and didn’t care he was dead. He tried to listen, however, to pay his respects, but he couldn’t, all he could hear was the blood pounding in his ears.

When it was his turn to speak, he rose on shaky legs, crossing to the front of the church slowly. He stood, blinking back tears as he looked round at the people sat there, looking back at him with sympathy in their eyes.

“Jamie was…” he began, already feeling the tears spilling forth as he glanced at the coffin behind him, “The best friend I ever had. He was so loyal, so kind and caring…he made…even the worst situation right by just….just being there.”

He broke off, raising a hand to his eyes to wipe away tears. “I know…he touched the lives of everyone he met, he helped them…to feel more…more confident in themselves, more optimistic…through the bad times. I would never have been able…to get through this far without him. I miss him more and more…every day, it’s so hard…to live my life without him, but if there’s one thing…that Jamie taught me,” he broke off again, unable to contain the sob that rose in his throat. When he spoke again, it was in a cracked, pained voice. “If there’s one thing he taught me, it was to be strong…to go on living, no matter what happens, and to live…every day as best you can.”

Madison pressed the handkerchief Alysia had given him to his eyes, trying to wipe away the tears that coursed down his face. He then turned to look at Jamie once more, at the peaceful expression on his pale face.

“I’m going to miss you…so much Jamie,” he continued, “Life will never...never be the same without you. I only hope that…you’ve gone to a better place, where you can have…everything you ever dreamed of.”

He couldn’t say anymore, it hurt too much.

Madison barely registered Alysia taking his arm, leading him back to his seat, but when he was seated, he turned to bury his face in the blond’s shoulder, sobbing out all his hurt, his pain. There were tears in Alysia’s eyes too, tears shed for a good and loyal friend and the best room mate he could ever ask for.

The vicar wrapped the ceremony up quickly and the people prepared to head over to Madison and Alysia’s home where there would be a small gathering to commemorate Jamie’s life with food and drink that had been prepared that morning.

Once they got home, Rob sat Madison in the kitchen at the table where they could keep an eye on him. He barely spoke a word to them, unable to talk through the tears that still streaked down his face.

Abut a half hour after they arrived, the elderly couple that none of them had recognised approached Madison in the kitchen, standing before him hand in hand.

“Hello,” the woman began, waiting until he looked up, “We understand, you were Jamie’s best friend.”

Madison nodded, raising the handkerchief to wipe at his eyes.

“My name is Sarah Fields, this is my husband Jack. We are…were…Jamie’s parents.”

That made Madison jerk his head up sharply, a frown on his face. He and Jamie had met at an orphanage when they had both been very young. Jamie had told him that his parents had abandoned him, that they couldn’t handle raising a child, so had dropped him off at the orphanage. Throughout his whole life, they had never tried to contact him, had never given him any signs to tell him that they were still alive.

“Jamie’s parents abandoned him,” he replied coldly and the woman shook her head sadly.

“We couldn’t handle him. We were going to contact him, but we found out that he…was dead, and we came to pay our respects.”

Madison could feel anger welling up inside him and he rose to his feet suddenly, drawing himself up to his full height and looking the woman in the eye.

“You have no respect for him if you could abandon him like that. Jamie was a beautiful and kind person, but you never got to see that because you were unfit as parents. And now he’s dead! You abandoned him, he was forced into a life of prostitution when he could have done any career he wanted! It’s all your fault!”

He didn’t wait to see their reaction, just shoved them out of the way and headed for the door, running out onto the cold street. He didn’t know where he was going, just wherever his feet lead him and he ran until he couldn’t run anymore.

Madison collapsed to his knees on grass covered in a thin layer of frost, head down and the tears spilling from his eyes, falling onto the fabric covering his thighs.

He was in a park, an expanse of grass a little way from the house that had a fenced off children’s play area. No one played there in the winter, the space was desolate and extremely cold.

Madison didn’t know how long he knelt in the grass, feeling the wetness soak through his dress and sending chills throughout his body. He was barely aware of footsteps behind him, on the path next to where he knelt and a moment later, someone crouched down next to him, laying a hand on his shoulder.

“Madison…what are you doing out here?”

He turned his head to see Zach crouched next to him, a look of concern on his face. Madison didn’t know what he was doing, but he flung his arms around the detective, burying his face in the man’s shoulder. Arms slipped around his back, pulling him close and a hand stroked his hair softly, soothingly.

“What are you doing out here in the cold? You must be freezing.”

Madison didn’t answer and the man just stayed still, allowing the boy to cry on his shoulder.

He couldn’t believe how beautiful Madison had looked, kneeling in the grass, so lost in despair. He meant what he had said the last time he’d seen the boy, he was unable to get him out of his head. Zach thought about him every time he went to bed, every time he got up in the morning, every time he had even a moment to spare. He couldn’t stop thinking about how he’d looked that morning in the cells, when he sat there sleepily, rubbing his eyes.

Zach held Madison until he eventually stopped crying, when there were no more tears left and he was thoroughly exhausted. Then the blond rose, keeping his arm around the boy as he lead him to his car, helping him into the passenger seat before sliding into the driver’s side. He was going to take him home, but then stopped himself, deciding that perhaps Madison needed to be away from the place for a little while.

The boy had fallen asleep by the time Zach pulled up in his driveway and he slipped round to the other side of the car, taking Madison in his arms to carry him into the house. He had a big home, too big for him to be living in on his own, but he’d inherited it from his parents. There were a large number of rooms, so he had no problem finding somewhere to put Madison.

Zach felt rather off as he slipped the soaking wet dress from the boy’s frame, like he was taking advantage of him. He couldn’t help but look his body over as he laid him on the bed, meaning to go find him some clothing. His eyes trailed down the too slender chest, to the too narrow waist, down long, thin legs. Madison was extremely pale, looking almost sickly.

The blond trailed his hand down the boy’s chest, frowning as he felt the ribs poking up beneath the skin. Madison was far too thin- he wondered how long it would be before he was bordering on anorexic.

Zach sighed as he got to his feet, disappearing from the room for a while to find Madison some clothes. He brought back a white shirt, which would be far too large on the boy’s slender frame, but it was all he could find.

It was hard to slip it on Madison without waking him, but once Zach was done, he lay the boy back on the bed, pulling the duvet up around him. He would allow him to sleep for as long as he needed, having purposely put him in the closest bedroom to the front room, where he’d be able to know when he woke up.

Whether Madison would be comfortable about being in his home or not was another matter.

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